Difficult People

An Underwear Story

I worked with a teacher who made a big mistake. She accidentally flushed a young 3-year-old's underwear when she was rinsing it out after a BM accident.

And it went right down the industrial-strength toilet, never to be seen again.

She apologized profusely to the parent who said, Oh no! That was his favorite red underwear! So the teacher felt really bad and drove all over town, but couldn't find the exact pair anywhere. So she bought a pair that was close, but the child didn't love them the same way.

The relationship between the parent and teacher was strained from then on. What could have been an opportunity to learn how to deal with loss became a lesson in the subtle art of blame.

Difficult people are everywhere, especially in the field of early care and education. That's surprising to many people. After 50 years in the field, I've seen more trouble between teachers, parents, and administrators than anything else.

Why?

Sociologists say that when individuals are at the bottom of the barrel, financially and status-wise, they tend to pick on each other to feel a little better in a situation that appears to be hopeless. Has anyone ever seen Do the Right Thing, the classic film by Spike Lee?

To support each other, we need to stop blaming and start using non-violent yet assertive communication skills. We all need to feel heard, we all need to matter. The same communication techniques we use for the children indeed work with adults. It's not always easy to remember this under pressure.

When people start working with young children, they rarely do so for the money. Most have a larger picture of what they want to accomplish, but obstacles get in the way.

Effective communication is essential when caring for young children as a team.

We've put together a presentation that features 10 things to say when under pressure or in difficult situations.

When someone is creating an obstacle for you, try one of these 10 proven phrases.

Just click on the cover to make a small donation and get the whole presentation as a gift.

Enjoy.

We also have an eBook featuring 22 phrases you can use to get young children to listen without yelling or time-outs. It's priceless because it contains the wisdom of 50 years of teaching and studying in the field of ECE.

Community members get the eBook for free and it's free to join so what are you waiting for? Click on the Magic Words cover and get your free copy now. You can start trying out those phrases right away!

Nanci J Bradley is an early childhood and family educator, author, teacher, family aerobics instructor, and an all-around fun-loving person. She believes in the power of sleep, healthy eating, lifelong learning, and most of all, PLAY!  She studied early childhood ed at Triton College and received her BS in education in 1986 from NIU. She received her MA in human dev from Pacific Oaks College in 2011. She lives and teaches in Madison WI and is the founder of early childhood rocks, a non-profit org dedicated to creating change through early childhood education.